Saturday, October 10, 2009

remembering tommy

Oh my gosh! I'm so back from whatever limbo I've been in. With what actually were two months of very rich kwentos going on in my life, became the most quiet of all.

Sometimes, words just aint enough to express what you truly feel.d

Iniweyz, one of my missed kwentos was that my nephew passed away because of dengue while we were still away. All was so sudden. My dear nephew suffere and gone because of the complications of dengue in just one week. I was waiting for my sister every minute to YM me details of his condition and experienced calling from a payphone at a train station to send words of love when he was in a coma - like a movie I swear - wish it was!! Sooo hard!!

Crying alone in an environment who does not share the same amount of grief as a family would was very very hard. They shared but they can only go as far as saying condolence - just not as much as you think a family would. You know what I mean. Its just hard to keep your smiling face to friends when just moments ago, you were reminiscing on past times with the departed.

I tried to write about this two days after my nephew passed away but I just cant go on so I stopped. I wrote:

"...two days ago, I lost my dear nephew to dengue. He passed away at the tender age of 17. This is a first to me - death of a family. No words can describe the grief and the longingness that I feel right now. Memories coming back one after the other with only tears to combat it with..."

So hard. Death is such the most painful.

To you Tom, I know you are in a much better place now but the whole family is going to miss you soooooooooo much! We love you dearly.

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